My 3 C's of Resiliency

Whenever I’m invited to give inspirational talks, give opening or closing remarks for leadership forums, I always share my 3C’s and connect it to Resiliency and Leadership. Over the years, I’ve seen myself and people around me go through a lot of problems, uncomfortable situations, tribulations, etc… and yet, we’re still all here and we come out stronger than we were before. I believe Resiliency plays a big role in Leadership as it forms a big part of the emotional quotient/EQ a person has. This also results to the maturity factor that is built over time by experience and learnings. Of course initially you master this on your own, before being able to role model for other people. It has to have consistency if you want to say you are indeed resilient. 

Now on to the 3 C’s…what does the 3 C’s stand for?  These are Commitment, Character and Compassion. Let me detail this further below.

First off, when we talk about Commitment, it doesn’t mean you blindly promise yourself that you’re going to do it or think of it everday. For me, Commitment has 3 components attached to it. 

• Commitment to be Open - This entails being open to new learnings, feedback and to more challenges in life. You have to be committed to yourself that you are not giving up if another issue or problem comes up. You have to be open to the fact that the issue could be bigger than what you’ve overcome before. You have to be aware that life won’t be as easy as 1, 2, 3. There will always be something that will come up to toughen you up.
• Commitment to Taking Care of Yourself - Now, that you recognize that there will be a lot more challenges coming your way as you go along the journey of life, you should not forget the fact that you are only Human. You should learn how to take care of yourself and know the boundaries and limits as to what your human body can take. If you are working everyday for an average of 18 hours, then you’re definitely in for a “sick leave” soon enough. It is ok to say NO if it meant sacrificing your health or life for it. There should be other options available and you choose the one that doesn’t kill you. It should be apparent to you that everyone in the company is dispensable- can be replaced anytime.  Taking care of yourself doesn’t only mean you take vitamins A-Z, but also consider having a balance in your life-think of what motivates you outside work. Go hiking, running, collect vinyl records, travel, cook, read books- anything that makes you feel you have a life outside your desk! 
• Commitment to Being Positive- Now that you recognize that there will always be challenges, and you need to take care of yourself, the 3rd factor of the commitment bit is to always be grateful and look at the positive side. You can always give yourself a day to cry, be sad, but at the end of the day, you have a choice to look at the situation and still be grateful for it. There will always be a reason to be thankful- no matter how difficult the situation may be.

Now, on to my second C- Character. As you learn to commit to being open to new challenges and learnings, at the same time, taking care of yourself and still be grateful for everything, this is where character is built. The foundation of your character comes from the strength you’ve gathered from the learnings, the tears, the experiences of all the problems and challenges you’ve faced. The character you have will then be the source of strength for your future endeavors- and character will remind you as look back on the things that made a stronger version of yourself. 

As we have talked about Commitment and Character, you will notice that all these revolve around yourself- how you emerge as a better person amidst the chaos you’ve gone through. But we are social beings, and as such, we need to look at the people around us. We need to be aware of the impact we create to everyone surrounding us. That’s when you come to the third C- Compassion. 

Compassion to help others, to reach out and help, to be more sensitive to how others feel. Most of the time, when we undergo tough times, we become so self centered that we wallow in misery and think the whole world falls on our shoulders. What we need to realize is that everyone undergoes through different challenges as well. I’ve always believed in the saying - If you can’t help others, at least don’t hurt them. Being sensitive and aware that anyone may be going through a lot even though it’s not obvious, could bring out what we call compassion. 

In my life, it took a lot to live by these 3 C’s consistently. I always remind myself that I always have to be Committed to be open, to take care of myself and to be grateful; so that I can build a strong Character to face further challenges and have the Compassion to help other people- before I can claim Resiliency and role model Leadership.